All relationships have some conflict. When conflict occurs, it does not mean it is the end of the world.
It only means its time to open your toolbox and do some self-reflection work.

First, think about how you contributed to the conflict and not just the other person.
When you have a problem:

Don’t have difficult conversations when you are very angry or tired.
Ask, “When is a good time to talk about something that is bothering me?”

Don’t criticize and don’t blame. Attack the problem, not the other person.
Open sensitive conversations with “I” statements; talk about how you struggle with the problem.
Don’t open with “you” statements; avoid blaming the other person for your thoughts and feelings.

Stay with the topic. Don’t use a current concern as a reason to jump into everything that bothers you.
Healthy relationships don’t use ammunition from the past to fuel the present.

Say, “I’m sorry” when you’re wrong. It goes a long way in making things right again.
Healthy relationships can admit mistakes.

Don’t assume things. When we feel close to someone it’s easy to think we know how he or she thinks and feels.
We can be very wrong! Healthy relationships check things out.

Take a time-out. If you want to yell and scream, take a time out to calm yourself down
Allow yourself to breathe and come back to the conversation later.

Healthy relationships don’t demand conformity or perfect agreement.
You are an individual with value and valid opinions; don’t try to bully.

Most importantly: Don’t hold a grudge. Let some things go.
Healthy relationships don’t hold on to past hurts and misunderstandings.
Be willing to forgive.Adapted from Joyce Woodford, Counseling Services, Kansas State University